Something great about LDS congregations (wards) is that because they are so small, most people can instantly pick out visitors. After sacrament meeting (the main church service), during Sunday school, and in Relief Society (the women's meeting), people welcomed me and chatted with me.
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Wards are organized geographically. Each household is assigned a church building and meeting time based on where they live. Depending on the density of the LDS population, a wards can consist of members from multiple counties down to a single apartment building. The wards can be up to 300 or 400 people. Once a ward grows to what church leaders think is too large, it is divided and two new congregations are formed. In areas where the LDS church is less established, the smaller congregations are called branches.
I love my ward. Being in my 20s and single, I choose to attend a Young Single Adult (YSA) ward. Everyone in my congregation is between the ages of 18-30, though most fall into the 25-30 range. Northern Virginia has become sort of a gathering place of young, LDS singles working in Washington, D.C. Everyone in my ward lives within a mile of my apartment. That's 350 Mormon singles in one neighborhood. On Sunday morning you can see the mass exodus of men in suits and women in skirts and heels scurrying down the sidewalks with their scriptures in hand.
The way the LDS church is organized lends itself to building community. Because you assigned to a congregation, and the congregations are kept fairly small, you are able to get to know most people in your ward even in a place as transient as D.C. When you move in, you are assigned two home teachers. These men come to your home each month to share a message from the church leadership, pray with you, and offer you service. In a singles' ward, home teachers often are those you ask for rides to the airport or to help you move a new dresser into your apartment. They also are there to provide you priesthood blessings, when you are in need of comfort or healing. Women are also assigned two women to "visit teach." Similarly, women visit the homes of these women each month, share a message, and offer service. As a woman, I have four people who I know I can turn to and who I know are specifically concerned for my well being.
In addition to home and visiting teaching, a variety of activities in the church help to build community. Monday night is set aside for Family Home Evening (FHE). While traditionally, as the name suggests, you would spend this night at home with your family, because we don't yet have families, we are organized into six ward families. Two members of the ward are assigned to be FHE "Mom and Dad" and plan activities for each group. Tuesday night is for Institute-- classroom-style scripture study. Each week, around 400 YSAs from two wards attend three or four courses that are offered. Typically, there is a "munch-and-mingle" afterwards where people can visit and get to know each other a little better. Nearly every month there is a ward temple trip, where everyone travels to the temple to worship in the house of the Lord together. These are only the church-sponsored programs in addition to the three hours we spend together every Sunday. Throughout the week and weekend there are any number of open-invitation parties, cookouts, dinner clubs, sports clubs, and outings.
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So when my mother asked me how church was when I returned home yesterday, I told her it was great and that the people were warm and friendly, but I couldn't help but feel like I was celebrating a holiday with someone else's family. The ward I visited was a great ward-- but it wasn't my ward.
I then proceeded to help her on a reflection paper she was working on for religion class she was required to take as a Catholic school teacher. She was assigned to read the book Models of Church by Avery Dulles, S.J. Basically, she was supposed to reflect on the models he presented and discuss which one most appeals to her. While there is A LOT I could say about the exercise, I'll leave you with one quotation from the book.
"Some people… are eagerly looking for the perfect human community.
They long for a community which fulfills all their needs and in terms of which
they are able to define themselves. This search is illusory, especially in our
own day when to be human means to participate in several communities and to
remain critical in regard to all of them. The longing desire for the warm and
understanding total community... is bound
to end in disappointment and heartbreak."
I respectfully disagree, Fr. Dulles.
While the LDS church is made up of people who are as imperfect as in any other church, and who-- as individuals-- might disappoint, the divinely-inspired organization of the church makes this type of community possible and, in moments when church members are fulfilling their responsibilities, a reality. Disappointment and heartbreak are not inevitable. Just as we don't choose the families we are born into, in the LDS church, we don't choose our congregations or those we visit or home teach or those with whom with serve in our callings. Perfect community is meeting people where they are and loving them for who they are, as well as allowing others to love and serve us.
